Most bereavements are complicated by other factors and can leave us disoriented and challenge our long-held beliefs and perspectives. Feelings of guilt, regret, anger, despair, sadness, fear and relief are all perfectly normal reactions to what is a generally a traumatic event, whatever the circumstances. 

Some people find it difficult to ask for help or might be embarrassed if; the loss occurred a long time ago, involved a stillbirth, miscarriage or someone that wasn’t close to them, was a pet rather than person, involved suicide or caused them to react in ways they feel ashamed of.

Loss can also affect our identity and sense of self and may not involve a death. It can result from; 

• loss of mobility or other physical or sensory impairment and injury

• divorce, separation or estrangement

• loss of parental responsibility (through separation or empty nest)

• redundancy, job loss or change in role

• house moves or emigration

• becoming a parent

All of these events may involve significant changes and can impact us as much as a bereavement.

How counselling can help

Trying to cope alone can make you feel even more isolated and exacerbate your state of mourning. Talking about your loss can bring a sense of relief and acceptance. Whilst you may never ‘get over’ your loss, I can help you find ways of learning to live with it. Eventually, for some people it can become a catalyst for positive change and personal growth.